And Now, A Word From Our Sponsors

Everyone knows it costs a lot of money to put on something like the Winter Olympics.  That's fine though, because a lot of people stand to profit from the Olympics, with all the money being thrown around for the games.  It's an investment.

Wait, did I say "people"?  Whoops, my bad.  What I meant was "corporations".

Oh, and that part there when I said "a lot" should actually say "a few".  Sorry about that.

About a year ago, all sorts of Vancouverites (along with out-of-towners who own property here) were walking around with dollar signs in their eyes because they were being told they could make thousands upon thousands of dollars for renting out their homes for the duration of the Olympics.  What they weren't told was that the city was going to take a cut in the form of a licensing fee.  They also didn't realize that temporary rental is fraught with insurance and liability issues; not to mention that finding a tenant, tenant-proofing your home, and cleaning up after some weird foreigner is a huge pain in the ass.  Lastly, the rental market for the Olympics isn't nearly as big as was advertised.  A co-worker of mine who owns a rental unit right next door to BC Place (opening and closing ceremonies venue) is barely breaking even in February when all her costs are added up.

Local businesses have long been anticipating the Olympic boost, but some of them have actually clued into the fact that the Olympics might ironically hurt them.  The games are a major disruption to the daily routine in this city.  In my last post about the Olympics I described how road and facility closures are going to change things around here, but at the time I didn't realize that colleges, schools, clinics, and even the courts are grinding to a halt for most of February.  There are plenty of shops and services that depend on business-as-usual to make money, and this will definitely be an unusual time for many businesses.

So, where's all the Olympic money going?  The province and the municipalities, especially Vancouver itself, are spending huge amounts of taxpayer money to accommodate the Olympics, and they're not going to get a cent of it back.  The locals are by and large not making a dime off the games.  Even the venues are not on Easy Street by any means.  Intrawest, the company that owns the Whistler ski hill, is in the middle of auctioning off all their ski resort properties due to massive debt.

To answer the question of where the money is going, all you need to do is follow it.  Look around you.  If you live anywhere in the first world, you've probably started seeing that little multicoloured Vancouver 2010 statue guy on various ads.  You can't put that thing on your ad if you aren't the "official _____ of Vancouver 2010", and you can't be the "official _____ of Vancouver 2010" unless you fork over a monstrous wad of cash to VANOC.

Not surprisingly, the only companies that seem to be displaying the little guy with red and yellow legs are huge multinationals.  McDonald's is the official restaurant (the irony of horrible fast food being the sponsor of the world's premier athletic event is a bit much), GM is the official vehicle supplier, HBC makes the official apparel, and so on.  These organizations spend millions and millions of dollars out of their vast marketing budgets for the right to put that little guy on their ads.  It is a big deal for companies to be able to do this.

I have to ask though: why?  What is the big deal?  Do people actually give a crap about which soft drink company is able to put the Olympic logo on their products?  Is it really going to bring in more sales?  Everyone knows what Coke is; why do they need to do this?

There is one side benefit to being an official Olympic sponsor, and that's the ability to bend the rules in your favour.  Let's say you're at an official Olympic event and you want a Pepsi.  Too bad, sucker!  It's Coke as far as the eye can see.  Ah, but the events are just the beginning!  This doesn't only apply to Olympic events, but also to anything that VANOC can reach: the City of Vancouver, Translink, the Province of BC, and even other sponsors.

I have to say, however, that anyone who believes that monopolizing the Olympics with a specific brand can only be good is wrong.  I have two real-life examples that prove otherwise.

Example 1: I am doing my Christmas shopping at The Bay (official Olympic clothing supplier).  I head over to the Olympic section and pick out a nice Team Canada hoodie for my sister.  I proceed to the cash register.  The following exchange occurs:

Employee: "Did you find everything you were looking for?"


Me: "Yes I did."


Employee: "That will be $.  Cash or VISA?"


Me: (not fully comprehending the situation) "Debit please."


Employee: "I'm sorry, we only accept cash or VISA.  This is an official Olympic site, and VISA is the only card accepted at Olympic sites."


Me: "Debit is essentially cash though."


Employee: "Sorry, I can't accept it.  Cash or VISA?"

At this point, here is what VISA and VANOC are hoping I will say:

VISA's Fantasy of Me: "Oh, that is perfectly sensible.  I am so glad I have a VISA card right here.  I really should use this thing for more of my purchases!" (gleefully hands over VISA card)

Here's what I actually said:

Real Me: "Motherfucking Olympics!  ARGH!" (begrudgingly hands over VISA card)

Example 2: my wife Melissa is at Waterfront station, Vancouver's main transit hub.  She is changing trains on her way home, and would like a Pepsi.  Normally she goes to the little kiosk in the middle of the station and purchases a can of Pepsi.  On this particular day, she was unable to find such a can at the kiosk.

Melissa: "Excuse me, do you have any Pepsi?"


Kiosk Guy: "No, sorry ... Coke only for Olympics."

Again, here's Coke and VANOC's fantasy:

Coke's Fantasy of Melissa: "Oh that's okay.  I am sure the Coke is just as good, if not better.  Perhaps I should purchase Coke instead of Pepsi from now on!" (enthusiastically purchases Coke)

And ...

Real Melissa: "Motherfucking Olympics!  ARGH!" (begrudgingly purchases Coke)

Isn't the point of sponsorship to improve the image of a brand?  In both these cases, the image of both the brand and the Olympics themselves were tarnished.  I'm no marketeer, but I don't think this is a good result.

Perhaps using my wife and I as subjects isn't representative of the population as a whole for the simple reason that we're not complete fucking morons like the average Canadian.  I am willing to entertain the possibility that the fantasy people described above actually exist on some level, but I have certainly never met them, and I hope I never do.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to drink a Granville Island Brockton IPA, the Official Beer of This Blog.  After that, I feel like going to Bamboo Cafe (the Official Restaurant of White People Who Live in Collingwood) and order some nachos (the Official Food of My Fat Ass).